{"id":85912,"date":"2023-03-20T22:52:03","date_gmt":"2023-03-20T22:52:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.rochester.edu\/uhs\/?p=85912"},"modified":"2023-07-18T14:15:01","modified_gmt":"2023-07-18T14:15:01","slug":"ask-the-sexpert-fingering","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.rochester.edu\/uhs\/ask-the-sexpert-fingering\/","title":{"rendered":"Ask the Sexpert: Fingering"},"content":{"rendered":"

Do you have a question about sexual health?\u00a0Submit your own question<\/a>\u00a0to our Sexpert<\/strong>!\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional, and it is always best to talk with your primary care provider if you are concerned about your health. To make an appointment with your primary care provider at UHS, call (585) 275-2662.<\/em><\/p>\n

Submission:\u00a0 <\/strong>(18F) I am into a new relationship and both me and my partner (19M) want to have sex. We have fingered each other but I didn’t like it when he fingered me. He tried among my entrance\/outer vagina but instead of feeling turned on, I simply feel myself being touched. I can turn myself on when I masturbate, but I don’t know where and how should I guide him during fingering to turn me on. Also, when he fingers me, should it be around my vagina or should it involve finger penetration?<\/p>\n

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It is great to hear that you are exploring on your own with masturbation to figure out what you like! Sometimes things can feel different when someone else is touching you than when you are touching yourself. This might be due to the amount of pressure they\u2019re using, how turned on you are beforehand, how wet you are, or many other factors.<\/p>\n

The first thing I would recommend is to do things to help you and your partner get turned on before <\/em>you begin any sort of fingering. You might think of this as \u201cforeplay\u201d, or activities such as making out, giving each other massages, touching each other in places other than genitals (breasts, butt, thighs), dirty talk, and anything else that you know will turn you or your partner on.<\/p>\n

Once you feel turned on and ready to try having your partner finger you, there are also some things you can do to help make it more pleasurable:<\/p>\n